Sales Humor: 12 weeks of Q4

holiday-sales-post

Oh, the holidays. It’s a great time to spend with family and relax… however, it’s not a great time to be in enterprise sales. More often than not, during the holiday season, there’s a dip in interested leads and deals, many prospects pushing off discovery calls or contract completions until the beginning of the new year.

If you’re an enterprise sales rep struggling to hit quota at the end of the year, you’re not alone! But we’re here to make it a bit more merry and bright with some sales humor!

We call this little number “The 12 days before the end of Q4.” Read quietly to the tune of “12 days of Christmas” (or sung loudly in your office, we’re not going to judge).


 

On the first week of Q4, my manager gave to me…. One impossible quota to achieve.

thats impossible no GIF by GIFt Delivery

On the second week of Q4, I set out for me…. Two lucky ties and one impossible quota to achieve.

confused arrested development GIF

On the third week of Q4, I pulled from my desk drawer…. Three closing pens, two lucky ties and had one impossible quota to achieve.

jason derulo office GIF

On the fourth week of Q4, I had to dial…. Four follow up calls, pull out three closing pens, two lucky ties and had one impossible quota to achieve.

follow up schitts creek GIF by CBC

On the fifth week of Q4, I started crunching numbers… I have five…… figures left….. to close…… and four follow up calls, three closing pens, two lucky ties and one impossible quota to achieve.

random winona ryder GIF

On the sixth week of Q4, my inbox bummed me out…. I got six “out of office” responses …. with five…… figures left….. to close…… I’ve still got four follow up calls, three closing pens, two lucky ties and one impossible quota to achieve.

jimmy fallon lol GIF by The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon

On the seventh week of Q4, I downed …. Seven cups of coffee … received six “out of office” responses …. with five…… figures left….. to close…… I’ve still got four follow up calls, three closing pens, two lucky ties and one impossible quota to achieve.

coffee GIF

On the eighth week of Q4, I set out to sell …. making eight discovery calls… with seven cups of coffee, received six “out of office” responses …. with five…… figures left….. to close…… I’ve still got four follow up calls, three closing pens, two lucky ties and one impossible quota to achieve.

matthew mcconaughey yes GIF

On the ninth week of Q4, my calendar was filled with … nine boring sales meetings….  eight discovery calls, seven cups of coffee, I received six “out of office” responses …. with five…… figures left….. to close…… I’ve still got four follow up calls, three closing pens, two lucky ties and one impossible quota to achieve.

tired meetings GIF by Kissing Sisters

On the tenth week of Q4, I was worn out …. After spending ten late nights working, attending nine boring sales meetings, eight discovery calls, with seven cups of coffee, received six “out of office” responses …. with five…… figures left….. to close…… I’ve still got four follow up calls, three closing pens, two lucky ties and one impossible quota to achieve.

working late GIF by The Orville

On the eleventh week of Q4, I was getting desperate, so …. I pulled eleven new lead lists, after spending ten late nights working, attending nine boring sales meetings, eight discovery calls, with seven cups of coffee, received six “out of office” responses …. with five…… figures left….. to close…… I’ve still got four follow up calls, three closing pens, two lucky ties and one impossible quota to achieve.

one direction scroll GIF

On the twelfth week of Q4, I was cutting it close …. I left twelve voicemails … after spending ten late nights working, attending nine boring sales meetings… having eight discovery calls, and seven cups of coffee, received six “out of office” responses …. with five…… figures left….. to close…… I completed four follow up calls, pulled out three closing pens, two lucky ties and one impossible quota achieved.

christmas yes GIF by Target

By Jessica Munday

Content Marketing Specialist at SalesHero, writing about technology, sales, AI and the future of business!

Published Nov 29, 2018

Posted in Tips & Tricks

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